Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Lunch notes

Up until now, the kids have always had free school lunches.  The silver lining in 15 years of schooling.

So now the kids are packers.  Or as they say here, "cold lunch."  I always called it packers, but anyways. 

Having to bring their lunches to school is great, but just something to add to my random trips to the school for forgotten items.  Homework, a signed permission slip, now lunch.  When you're a stay home mom, it's what you're good for.  Running forgotten items to school so your child can be less responsible. 

Yeah, I got it.

And it's not the younger girls that forget things, it's the older boys.  The girls are made of maturity, properness, cleanliness, responsibility.  The boys?  It's comical.

So to "teach them to not forget their lunches" I would do what they see as the worst thing ever.  I write heart-felt feelings, on the front of their lunch bag.  In marker.

"You are my world!"
"You're so handsome, I know all the girls just think you're hot!"
"You can achieve anything you want because you're awesome!"

Stuff like that.  Yes, I do believe it, but normally I'm not one to trumpet those kinds of things.  Unless I'm trying to teach my kids to be more responsible.

The boys would come home from school and beg me to stop writing on their lunch bags.  "It's sooo embarrassing!"  "Well, I do love you and I want you to know those things.  And I wouldn't write them if I didn't have to bring your lunch to you!"

The girl's ears apparently perked.

"What are you talking about?"

So guess who started "forgetting" their lunches?

I sensed that the girls LIKED the idea.  They have actual lunch bags, so I can't write on the outside of their lunches.  I delivered a couple of forgotten lunches to the girls with notes put inside their lunch bags. 

And then it happened.  Getting ready for school one morning, Angela handed me a pen and a stack of paper and said, "here Mom, for our notes."  It wasn't a demand, it wasn't joking, it wasn't even asking.  It was a simple statement.

Oh my gosh!  The innocence of it!  The preciousness of it!  The NECESSITY of it!

So every day, I write 5 notes, sometimes 6 (yes, Matt gets them every once in a while too!)  The boys at first would actually pack their lunches and smash them into their backpacks before I could slip their notes in them, but I persisted and now, they actually wait for me to write them and THEN smash their lunches into their backpacks.

The kids love the notes.  And I'm glad this idea evolved.  My greatest blessings go to school every day, get lambasted with who knows what (OK, I KNOW with what).  I think reading a "love note" from me is a great way to lift them, to remind them of how important they are, to lift their spirits, to put a spring in their step, to help them deal with peer pressure, or strengthen them against temptation.  It's nice to hear great things about yourself, especially from your parents. 

I do have to keep Addi's simple.  Her reading isn't up to par with her siblings.  The other day my note to her was, "I love your laugh.  Always keep laughing!"  When I picked her up she said, "Mom, your note was weird and made my friends laugh."
 "Oh really?"
"You said you love my lunch.  Always keep lunching.  That was really weird."  When I told her what I had REALLY written, she belted out her awesome belly laugh.  The girl laughs all the time.  Especially at herself.

I found out my daughters save their notes. 

I wish I had done this long ago, but that's OK.  Never too late to start a good habit.

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

It's all just moments

My morning started out with me being woken up by Addi, in tears, saying Dallin had dropped her.  I rolled out of bed, stumbled towards his bedroom, and bumped into him coming out of the bathroom.

The girls' room gets hot at night, so they opt to sleep in the twin bed that is in Dallin's room.  All 3.  In the twin.  The twin is meant for Owen and Riley, who sleep in my bed.  So it all works ... out.

And apparently Dallin attempted a transfer.  And failed.

"I needed to get ready and I didn't want her in here while I got ready, so I carried her to her own room."
"And dropped her?"
"No, I set her down."

Yeah, right.

Then there were no lunch bags for the boys who hated the fact that they had to tote their lunches in Wal-Mart bags.  (I reminded them that I used to take my lunch to school in the empty bread bag with hopes that roaches didn't rush out, so no complaining!)  Then there were no snack baggies for Cheetoes, so the kids packed about 3 cups worth into regular baggies.

Then I found a smashed banana in the carpet.  Then I found a top I had just sewn for Sadie in the dirty laundry. 

Then as I tilted the laundry detergent forward to fill the measuring cup, detergent poured out the top, covering my arm in soap.

Then as I quickly began scrubbing out the kitchen sink greasy water mixed with Comet splashed all over my shirt.

Then I wondered "was this the reason I was placed here on Earth?  Is this IT?"

Then I watched my dear Sadie play with her brothers outside with the little boy next door.  He in his little batman/power ranger/cowboy outfit, and mine in their pjs, Sadie in her fireworks piggy tails.  She was feeling such a part of their boy group.

Then I laid her down and she fell asleep.  Then Riley came in and fell asleep.  Then I read my scriptures (please know, this is a brand spanking new goal of mine and I've been going strong now for the past 3 days.  Before that, the only thing I read were FaceBook status updates.  No joke.)  Then I cleaned.  The entire house looks great at this very moment.

Then I thought, "This IS the reason I was placed on Earth and I am so incredibly blessed."

I'm not being cheesy.  With sleeping kids and a clean house, how could one NOT feel content?

And I'm reminded of a sentence a sweet lady said at the last Relief Society dinner activity thing I went to.  She said that life is just moments.  Just. Moments.  Both good and bad, but moments all the same.  And it's those moments that I know I will reflect on, and crave to repeat, when I'm an old lady  putting packages together for my grandchildren.

What I'm getting at is in a blink, I will have adult children.  These years of underwear clad 2 year olds, soccer carpooling, dress matching, late night runs to the grocery store for classroom party snacks, these years will be over in a blink.  And the big question is, how will I take care of these moments that fill up these years?

I have lots of bad moments.  My kids have heard all the swear words they will hear in middle school  from the lips of their mamma first.  I have moments where I just break down and cry because really, how can one person be required to do so much?

And then I have the great moments.  When I sit and enjoy a great laugh with Colby or watch Dallin score a header in his soccer game.  Or when my little bubble butt Riley, in his Sponge Bob undies, runs up to me, hugs my legs, then runs off. 

It's all just moments.  Each experience, both good and bad, fleeting.  So fleeting. 

I need to remember this when the moments are not desirable.  And bite my tongue or at the very least, say the not so offensive swear words.  And when the moments are great, to hold on to them, to take them in.  Because just like that, all present moments become past memories.

OK, and I have so much more to say, but in 20 minutes I need to start my afternoon school pick ups, then track pick ups, then soccer drop offs, then coach 2 soccer teams, then soccer pick ups.  Then dinner.

Oh and of course there's Activity Days. 

Yup, all just moments!  :)


Sunday, April 5, 2015

Awesome goal yesterday

Yesterday Dallin scored his 2nd goal.  Making it 2 goals in 2 games.  I didn't get to photograph it because I was sucked in to what was taking place.  The ball was about 1000 feet in the air and I watched as Dallin and about 3 other players all had their eyes on it, poised to head the ball.  Dallin wanted it the most.  He jumped the highest and got his head on the ball, perfectly timed, sending it to the bottom right corner of the goal.

I watched his face.  He was SOOO HAPPY.  Even today he said to me, "You know how when you do something so great, you just can't stop believing you did it?"  So cute, so innocent, so true. 

I am so happy that happened for him.

I told him, "You need to thank your coach in VA for that goal."  Dallin asked why and the answer I gave is why I'm blogging tonight.

The team Dallin played with in VA was a great team, coached by a great man.  Dallin was 1 of 2 players pulled up from his "B" team to play with this "A" team last year.  Before the season started with his new team, he broke his leg and the repercussions were significant.  He was slow.  Clumsy.  Played carefully ( aka not aggressively.)  He pretty much benched his first season on his new team.  And I couldn't blame the coach for benching him. 

Spring season had Dallin continuing with this team and much stronger.  His leg was perfectly healed and he was back to his old self.  However he continued to bench.  Even when fellow players were having off games, he still benched.  One game he played 6 minutes.  He scored a goal then was removed from the field.

I couldn't understand it and Dallin grew frustrated. 

My first impulse was to approach his coach and share my concerns.  My 2nd impulse was to approach my son and make the best out of the situation.

I went with plan 2.  I let him know I understood his frustrations and then made a game plan for him.

"Dallin, you're going to have to work harder than the rest of the team to prove yourself to your coach that you are not a bench warmer.  Just "move up the bench" sorta speak."

I thought, "rather than 'fight this battle for or even with Dallin, let Dallin fight it by himself."  Because lots more would come out of it. 

So Dallin worked on his skills.  He was always in the back yard juggling, shooting, dribbling in between toys and rocks.  He simply knew he had to out perform his team mates if he wanted to play.

Fast forward to yesterday.  New town, new team, new coach.  The soccer here is actually a level above VA soccer.  I think it's because here the team practices year round.  My kids can't join them year round as they participate in other sports, but that's fine.  Pushes them more during the season.

Dallin played 95% of the game as both a defender and offensive player.  He played strong, hard, and the header showed me he was fine to try "new things" on the field.  Love it!

He had to push himself in VA.  Harder than the rest of the team actually.

I'm so glad I didn't take matters in to my own hands.  So glad we decided to put matters into Dallin's hands and figure things out for himself.  By doing so, it's made him a stronger player and when it comes down to it, a stronger person too.