300

I loved the name Soren the first time I heard it.  It was an Elder I taught at the MTC.  I wanted that name for one of my boys so badly!  I loved the name William because, well, all cute boys are named William and it's a family name on both my side and Matt's.  And Gideon was in the mix because of the Gideon in the Book of Mormon.  I mean, I absolutely love Captain Moroni.  I plan to search him out first thing when I pass over to the next life.  It'll be a long line though for him.  Lots of people love him.  But I also love Gideon, just as much.  He was more of the "silent" hero in my opinion and I LOVE the silent heroes.  Gideon was so full of wisdom and insight and so fiercely loyal and brave.  I can't wait to meet him.

We knew we'd know which one we'd give to our baby once we met him.  As soon as he was out, Matt knew and I agreed about 10 minutes later.

When we found out about all of his stuff, we realized we had named him perfectly.  And when I studied up on the Gideon of the Old Testament, I got goose bumps as I realized, he was named way too perfectly.

Which brings me to the purpose of this post.  When it rains, it pours.  Gideon was born end of Feb and we spent a month in the nicu.  We brought him home March 24th.  We're currently living in very small quarters.  We want so badly to find a house that better fits our family.  Not looking for any mansions, just something ... not so tiny.  Our lease here ends in May.  And we listed our house in VA last week with the hopes that if we sell it, we can buy a home here.  Yes, buy.  People don't believe in renting to a family with 9 kids.  And the kids are getting quite cranky. 

So basically, looking for a miracle.  Can we sell our VA home in time to buy a house that we can move in to by the end of May?  And in the meantime, can I keep it together mentally and emotionally as I watch Gideon deal with his heart condition? 

Then I'm reminded of the story of Gideon in the Old Testament.  Israel was in bondage to the Midianites and the Lord tells Gideon that through him, He would free Israel.  Gideon gathers some 32,000 men to fight the Midianites and the Lord tells him, "too many.  Let the chicken ones go home" (more or less, in my own words).  He was then left with 10,000.  Still too many.  So the Lord has Gideon take them to the river and according to the style of drinking from the river, sends all but 300 home.

300. 

300 to fight the Midianites.  Not to just fight, but to free Israel from.

In my opinion, an impossible situation.

But we learn that the reason is so the Israelites could see and gain or strengthen their testimonies in the power of the Lord's hand.  He wanted the army small so He could make miracles happen.

Sometimes I feel like the Lord does this on individual levels.  He has us "reduced to 300" so He can make miracles happen.  That's the only answer I can come up with.  I have found myself in the most impossible of situations so many times where truly, only by the hand of God could I get out and as I look back on my situations and reflect on them ... it's really the "Footprints in the Sand" type stuff.

I was reduced to "300" that month in the nicu and I tell you, the Lord showed His hand so many times.  I'm reduced right now to "300" as I feel completely backed into a housing corner.  I'm reduced to "300" with my new role as a mother to a baby with heart and lung issues that scare me to death. 

I can only imagine how Gideon must have felt with his 300.  I can only imagine how those soldiers must have felt.  I'm sure there was some fear, some uncertainty, but even so, they moved forward.  It's all I can do right now.  I have no idea what's going to happen with our housing situation.  I have no idea how Gideon will do over the next few weeks and into his surgery.

I do know how the story in Judges ends.  It's miraculous, it's genius, it's even sorta comical (I think anyways.)  It's proof that the Lord really is in the details of our lives.  And I can trust Him.