10 mos old

I don't know what it's going to be like to have a child with downs.  I don't know what it's going to be like to have a teenager with downs.  I don't know what it's going to be like to have an adult with downs.

But I do know what it's like to have a baby with downs.

Gideon thus far has been an absolute joy.  He's love.  He's smiles.  He's relaxed.  He's low stress.  He's calm.  He's self entertaining. 

He comforts.  He's "chill-lax."  He's infectious.  He communicates. 

He's perfection.

When he's happy, like really happy, he's does this "booty-scooting" thing, minus the actual scoot.  Just rocking.  When he's meeting someone for the first time, he stares.  They will not get a smile.  He's just studying.  If he's more shy, he'll put his head down and find the floor to be uber interesting.  If he wants you to pick him up, he every so slightly raises his arms.  He's learned that it's all he needs to do.

If he's WAY excited, he'll boot-scoot AND clap AND put his head down, then up again, then down and have this amazingly cute/funny/hilarious smile.  If he's frustrated, he wipes his face with his tiny fingered hand.  If he's tired, he whines. 

If he sees me, it doesn't matter what he's doing, he won't take his eyes off me.  My kids will at times tell me to NOT come around Gideon cuz he's laughing and playing with them and they know if he sees me, he'll simply, get distracted.

What a ginormous ego boost he is to me!  ;)

I get so much done with Gideon because he's just happy to be playing at my side.  He loves playing with my fabric scraps.  He loves playing with paper and those envelopes with the plastic windows.  That sound really gets him.

I was Facetime talking to my brother Samuel this AM and Samuel goes, "Let Gideon meet my puppy!"

Have you seen "Bedtime Stories" with Adam Sandler?  That guinea pig and Samuel's puppy have twinner eyeballs.  Gideon HAD been staring at Samuel but when eyeballs came into view, Gideon just looked away.  He looked down, he buried his face in my arms.  Samuel and I were laughing so hard.  Gideon doesn't like large eyeballs apparently!  ;)

He's who the kids ask for first thing in the AM, even on school days.  "Is Gideon awake?"  If he is, they get so excited and he responds with smiles.

A favorite activity is letting him "attack".  They'll put their head in his face and he'll grab hair and try and "eat" their faces.  Oh my gosh!!  Kids will have scratch marks on their face from his nails where he's grabbing so hard to "eat" them, but they'll be laughing soooo hard.  And there's Gideon, just looking around, happy with the reactions he's caused.

Needless to say, Gideon is fun.  He's a literal piece of Heaven in my home.  I look at him and seriously don't see "down syndrome" but rather, I look at him and think, "I can't believe I get you!"  I say that all the time! 

The kids are forever telling him and each other how "popular" Gideon will be when he's in high school.  They're already talking about whether or not he'll play basketball or wrestle.  He's definitely gonna play soccer.  They want to see him run track.

I absolutely love and am so grateful for the immense BOND my kids have with this child.

YEARS ago I heard a father say, regarding his daughter who had ... something.  It wasn't downs but she was non-verbal and walked around and just stared.  I can't remember what it was, but anyways, he said, "The best way to raise your teens is with a sibling with special needs."

I remember believing him but wishing I hadn't heard him say that because I wanted nothing to do with having a child with any type of "special needs."  More recently, when I was pregnant with child number 7, I was playing the piano for a Primary program.  I was super super  SUPER nervous, but had a calming experience.  I literally felt, right beside me, the presence of 2 kids.  A girl who simply brought me calm and comfort, and next to her was a small boy.  He was smiling and I had this feeling that he was just ALWAYS happy. 

I told Matt that I thought #7 wasn't going to be our last because I felt "a girl comfort me."  I purposefully left out the 9th child.  For 2 reasons.  I couldn't believe we'd actually have NINE kids and his joy actually scared me because I thought, "would he have down syndrome?"  Because down's kids are known for their constant happiness.  I thought, "that's just my weird thinking cuz I can't stop having kids so we'll cross that bridge when we come to it."  And, "I don't want any kids that aren't "perfectly healthy, across the board."

Yes, my honest thoughts.

Now that I've been REUNITED with Gideon, I realize REALLY how LUCKY.  No, not lucky, but rather BLESSED BEYOND COMPARE that he's mine.  And I'm his. 

I can tell that Gideon was an elite before this life.  He was one of Heavenly Father's most valiant, noble and wise.  And we were close!!!  I was bonded, before this life, with someone so valiant, noble and wise that he gets Heavenly Father's protection here on Earth.  He can't be tempted by the devil.  He's divinely protected.  I walked with and had very personal relations with this type of spirit and we get to be together again here on Earth.

I'm so grateful for this knowledge and for knowing it's true. 

Now what do I have my sights set on?  I want to adopt a baby with down syndrome.  Maybe even more than one.  Because they are Heaven on Earth and I want to be an active and intimate part of that. 

I want the world to know Gideon and I want the stigma around trisomy-21 to be a positive, exciting one.  Because Gideon is pure positive.  He's pure exciting.  He's pure joy.  He's pure love.  He's pure.